Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
