Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
