She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i think i have herpe
just one?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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