I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
