Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
The adults are the big ones right?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
