She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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