real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize