Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
