If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
