i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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