it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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