are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
