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• (248): View more from Michigan

  with your own penis?

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• (323): View more from California

  You know you want to come over later

  (1-323): View more from California

  1:27a: Um no

  (1-323): View more from California

  1:45a: Maybe

  (1-323): View more from California

  2:05a: Probably

  (1-323): View more from California

  2:38a: I'm outside, let me in

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.

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• (707): View more from California

  I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life

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