What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
