You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
