don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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