I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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