Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
false alarm, still single
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
