i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
