I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize