did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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