i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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