you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
