I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
