How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
third nipple confirmed
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
