My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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