Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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