let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
