What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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