Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
