Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I would ride that face into the sunset
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
