What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize