Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
