The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I FOUND THE LEGS
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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