remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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