1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
nutella sex= disaster
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize