No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Use "feeling words"
Yay
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
