Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
