When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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