apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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