She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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