You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
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