So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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