Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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