I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
not ubering you a puppy
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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