Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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