He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
