he thought i was a dude.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize
