oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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