its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
