I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
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