well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Two words: blizzard sex
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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